Dungeons-Dragons-5th-Edition-Review-Cover-600x337

Jumping Back In or “How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love D & D”

Well, I obviously did not keep up with this blog like I intended to.  Here’s another start.

So, what’s been going on in my life?pathfinder___mimzy_za_by_yuikami_da-d57gwy0

Well, the most interesting thing has been joining my first Dungeons and Dragons group.  That’s live action role play, with real human people.  It’s me, my husband, my best friend Kelly, her boyfriend Dave and our dungeon master, Evan.  Even though I know these people, it was still a very daunting experience the first time we sat down to play.  I felt myself shrinking into myself, becoming almost paralyzed with stage fright.  I couldn’t really talk as my character, and very rarely said anything at all during the first couple of hours of our game.  I felt like I was letting everyone down, because I was so excited about this and I had worked so hard on my character, and I had told them all about my ideas and the direction I thought my character would go.  But when it came time to role play, all of that excitement and confidence evaporated, and I was utterly unsure of myself.  Luckily, the others in the group started things off and trudged through the awkwardness, and my husband really stepped up and got involved, knowing that I would follow his lead and jump in when I felt comfortable.  He has this uncanny ability to be able to tell when my anxiety levels are up, and he does what he can in those moments to try to ease me out of it.  I really need to be more thankful for him, he is very understanding and it’s amazing how when you’ve been with someone so long, there is a kind of wordless way of communicating that evolves between you.  He knows when I need him just by reading my body language, or making a brief moment of eye contact.

11666283_10153075211968111_395690132595445292_n

Anyway, back to the game.  I have to say, having played MMORPG’s I knew some of the basic ideas of the game, how the format was probably going to go, what the world would be like, etc.  However, the experience of playing the game is so much different than I had imagined, or even different from what I had seen on TV.  (I’m looking at you, amazing Community episode about D & D – so far there have been no gratuitous sexual encounters at an inn.)  Once I had shaken off my anxiety, I really got into playing my character, even adopting a sort of Cockney accent to really help differentiate the character from myself, which was a tip I had read on a forum about D & D.  Once you feel comfortable with your group mates and really get to know and enjoy your character, the game opens up for you and you realize there are so many things to do.  Yes, we follow the quests and fight the monsters and loot the dungeons, but on the way there are decisions to make and problems to solve, and it’s so much fun to see what your team mates come up with.  The DM keeps us on track, and provides some great NPC voicing as well as presenting dilemmas that force the group to work together.  To me, it was like playing an MMO with a guild I had grown close with, except we were interacting with each other in real time and getting that social aspect that most gaming seems to lack.  I have to give props to our DM for writing some interesting content, and weaving in pre-made instances with a story line of his own.

We have our third session coming up soon and I’m excited to get my Paladin gnome back into action.

In the meantime, I will be attending Tampa Bay Comic Con on Saturday, and will have a report up on my blog shortly after that.

As usual, thanks for reading.

-Lisa–

tumblr_ll18yyToyq1qclfow

Introduction

Hello, Internet.

I’m Lisa, a 29 year old social worker and geek / nerd / scifi and fantasy connoisseur.  I used to write for SciFiGuy.ca but took some time off when I got promoted at work, because I have a hard time with time management and fatigue, which is part of my depression and anxiety.  I was starting to feel overwhelmed working the 9-5 and then coming home and reading / writing for my reviews, and being pressed for deadlines there as well as at work.  After a couple of years focusing on my geriatric social work and planning my wedding, I am now a happily married geek and I feel like I have more time to devote to writing and blogging.  You wouldn’t believe the weight that comes off your shoulders after planning and executing a wedding pretty much by yourself.  Well, just imagine a whole year where all of your free time is devoted to crafting, organizing, making phone calls, interviewing and booking vendors, and spending every last dollar of your excess income (which isn’t much, trust me) on all of this stuff.  It was stressful, and a rough year financially – but my husband and I did it together, and we paid for our approximately $8,000 wedding out of pocket with no debt left at the end of the day.  However, we did have to forgo our SciFi conventions for the year, which was hard to do!  Conventions are our mutual hobby, so it was a hard thing to give up for a whole year.  I’m sure we’ll be making up for it , so expect some convention reporting from yours truly!

My goal with this blog is to provide reviews of current Scifi and Fantasy shows airing on TV and Netflix, as well as the occasional film and convention report.  I also want this to be a place I can talk about my life and my struggles, because the more I read blog posts from other female writers on the internet the more I realize that I’m not as alone as I’ve felt my whole life when it comes to my struggles with mental illness, my feelings of being different and my difficulties just dealing with being a woman in our society.  I wish I had known when I was eighteen and in college that there was a community of people out there facing the same fears, the same insecurities and the same doubts.  I went through a lot of hard times in college, and I went through all of it pretty much alone.  My hope is that by making  some small contribution to the blogging community I can help others see that they’re not alone and that no matter what you’re going through, you can survive it and better yourself.  It does get better, and whatever you are experiencing, there’s someone out there experiencing it too.